London, UK. The pound has continued to tumble and is now trading at 6 litres a barrel. Traders are quick to blame the fall on 'quantitative quantity'. They argue that the meagre size of the average pound coin is reducing confidence in sterling.
Financial analysists predict that simply increasing the size of a pound coin to the size of a small grapefruit will restore confidence to post-war levels.
The new coins will capture our glorious monarch (in full high definition: 2 billion pixels per square furlong) updating her Twitter status. The new coins will go on sale from April and are expected to cost around £1.50.
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